Christmas 2009

Our first Christmas without Faith. Needless to say, it is hard not to be emotional. Everyday is challenging, however a Holiday is intended to recognize love and family. Because of that, it is a reminder that an extremely important member of our family is missing. It is hard to get into the spirit of Christmas. I have 7 boxes of Christmas decorations and I probably put out an equivelent of 1 box. But, my decorations are lovely because they are ones that are in memory of my mom and Faith. My mom loved poinsettia's so I have lots of those around and any decoration with the word Faith is scattered throughout the room. I also bought a tree that is Faith's height and primarily decorated it in gold. I found a beautiful yellow butterfly ornament that definitely makes it a "Faith tree". An angel that lights up in multiple colors sits at the top. So, I was able to find a way to recognize Christmas and incorporate the ones not here in physical form in a way that can actually make me smile.

We went to a Candle Lighting Ceremony through Compassionate Friends that will now be included as one of our Christmas traditions. It was a ceremony that was equally as beautiful as it was sad and it was nice to be with others that truly understand. It was such a special way to honor Faith and the rest of the child angels. I am hoping by formally honoring my Faith, it will give me some solace and because of that allow me to concentrate on making the rest of the season special for my other children.

At this Candle Lighting ceremony (that is done worldwide) to remember the children that left us to0 soon a man named Alan Pedersen sang this amazing song. Alan is a bereaved parent, also, who lost his daughter. Here are the lyrics to this special song:

Tonight I hold this candle
In memory of you
Hoping someway, somehow
My love will shine through
I close my eyes
Lost in the glow
There are so many things
I want you to know

This candle says I love you
This candle says I miss you
This candle is saying
I remember you
When I'm holding it toward heaven
It feels like you are near
If you're looking down tonight
And see this candle burning bright
It says I'm wishing you were here

In the glow of this candle
I can almost see you smile
And it carries me away
For a little while
To another time
Another place
When all it took to light up my world
Was your beautiful face

This candle says I love you
This candle says I miss you
This candle is saying
I remember you
When I'm holding it toward heaven
It feels like you are near
If you're looking down tonight
And see this candle burning bright
It says I'm wishing you were here

Someday, some way
I'll see you again
I'll hold you
In my heart
Until then....


I bought all of Alan's CD's and this is my personal favorite:

We got to know the magic of their smiles, if only for awhile.
Wasn't it beautiful?
They taught us how to love so deep, feel so complete.
Wasn't it wonderful?

Even if we knew that it would end,
If we had the chance we'd do it all again.
Lets Celebrate the Children. Celebrate our kids.
Celebrate the Children and remember that they lived.

(Chorus)
They are our Strength.
They are our Heroes.
They're our Angels now.
Let sorrow wait, lets celebrate.

They left so many gifts behind for each of us to find.
It's magical.
They're with us everyday, give help along the way.
It's Spiritual.

They're part of everything we say and do.
We're better people now because of them, it's true.
Celebrate the Children and send them our love.
Celebrate the Children looking down from up above.

(Chorus)

So fly butterfly. So long sweet balloon.
Float up through the clouds, somewhere beyond the moon.
Let them know we'll see them soon.

Celebrate the Children. Celebrate our kids.
Celebrate teh Children and remember that they lived.

(Chorus)

Celebrate the Children. Send them all our love.
Celebrate the Children they're looking down from up above.

(Chorus)

Oh Celebrate, Celebrate.
We got to know the magic of their smiles, if only for awhile.
Wasn't it Beautiful?



Enjoy the Holidays. Give lots of love to your family and give thanks for all that you have.

Shelly